Sunday, March 25, 2012

A Rough Week

This week (or really the last couple of weeks) have been really hard on me.  I believe I last left off having been to the MedCheck once and having the doctor tell me that I was fine-ish, just needed some rest. I stayed home for a day and thought that I was feeling a little better.

But then, this cough hit.  I couldn't breathe.  I couldn't talk sometimes without going into terrible coughing spasms.  I actually started taking cough drops.  I have NEVER in my life been able to stomach a cough drop.  I was eating them by the bag and adding them into my calories for the day.  Then, I read the "dosage" of cough drops.  One every two hours.  OH.  That's not good.  I was consuming far more than that. I decided to go back to the doctor.

Good news.  I wasn't crazy.  There really was something wrong with me.  (Although "allergy induced bronchitis" sounds really fake to me.)  Regardless, they acknowledged that I couldn't breathe and something needed to be done.  I got a breathing treatment in the office, a prescription for Prednisone and some "good" cough medicine that was going to allow me to sleep at night.  I was excited.  I was going to get better!

Sort of.  The breathing treatment helped for a bit.  The Prednisone helped (although I was still only breathing at what felt like 85% or so).  The cough medicine was a) the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted and b) helped I guess.  I don't know what it would have been like without it, so I suppose that I will trust that it was doing it's job.  Here's the issue.  The Prednisone made me gain weight.  This was NOT good for my psyche.  I started the week a mere 4 pounds away from my 1st goal.  I am now 8 pounds away from this goal.  I know it didn't help that my family was in town and I made some terrible food choices over the weekend, but I think that was partly spurred on by the previous weight gain and a "who cares" kind of attitude.  It was BAD.

I have some major body image issues.  I FEEL fatter now than I did 50 pounds ago.  I can literally feel my fat oozing over the sides of my pants even if it is not.  (Now I sound like a total nut job, right?)  But, I'm working on it.  We bought the treadmill today. Even thought I am not fully recovered, I actually ran on it tonight.

Dude.  Really hard.  Couldn't breathe for a good while.  Had many coughing fits, but kept going.  I did decide to stop after 2 miles, even thought my original plan was 3. On the bright side, the running part wasn't the hard part.  It was the breathing part, which is mostly unrelated to the running.  I like the treadmill and think that I will use it often and am feeling motivated to become a "runner" again.  (Was I ever a runner?  That's probably up for debate.)

So, I guess that's it.  I'm not posting a weight update because it's too depressing for me right now.  The size 12 pants I just got to buy last weekend are questionably fitting, but I'm hopeful that by this weekend, they will be good again.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Check in and the Plague

This post is slightly late coming to you this week because of The Plague.  I am unsure what nasty virus I have caught, but it is a giant pain in the tukus.  Friday night, I started to feel crummy.  I went to bed early.  I was supposed to get up early to take the pep band to the Regional game.  I still felt horrible, but got up and got in the shower and just about passed out.  I couldn't do it.  So, Alicia took the kids to the game.  I laid around all day Saturday.  I thought I was better on Sunday.  I babysat my niece and nephew and it was good - until the drugs wore off.  Then I crashed.  I felt lousy on Monday, but made it in.  Didn't really make it through my classes very well.  By the end of the day I was wearing my coat (inside) and shivering. I came home and went to bed.  Alicia took Parker to ballet.  I thought I was doing  Tuesday - still feeling crummy.  This is getting ridiculous.  I go to school.  Apparently, I am now looking like hell as well because several people ask me if I am ok.  My co-worker graciously volunteers to teach my classes if I will enter his grades.  Yes, please.  I can do that.  I leave early and go the MedCheck.  There's nothing wrong with me.  (Other than the fever I have had since Saturday.)  Awesome.  The doctor tells me to rest (he should tell that to IPS) and drink lots of fluids.  I cashed in my last available day today and am dozing on the couch.  I had stinkin' better be well by tomorrow because I'm SO over this.

As far as the weight loss goes....Um.....Not sure where I left off.  (I know my actual weight, but I don't know what it was the last time I posted.)  I think I lost a couple more pounds.  I have 6.4 more pounds to go before I reach that healthy BMI and 25.4 more to go before I reach that "college" weight!

OH - and at the MedCheck yesterday, my heart rate was low.  The Nurse asked me if I was a runner because runners normally have a lower heart rate! :)  Makes me wanna get back on the running bandwagon so to speak.  A medical professional actually thought I might be an athletic person!!!!!!!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Movin' on Down

Another week down.  I didn’t do too badly this week , weight wise at least.  I am down 3.8 pounds, which is pretty good.  I did make my goal (barely) of breaking into the new set of 10.  I think my metabolism might be changing slightly.  I don’t know how or why that would happen, but I ate terribly this weekend (think cupcakes, Texas Roadhouse rolls and Bazbeaux pizza) but I still lost weight.  I guess that’s a good sign.

I didn’t, however, exercise at all.  I feel like that’s really bad, but at the same time it feels more real to my life.  We didn’t get the treadmill (yet).  I’m SO hoping that things will slow down soon so that we can go get it.  I have really enjoyed the last few nights on the couch, but am kind of looking forward to being able to run again.  I just am NOT motivated to go outside anymore.  It’s bad.  I feel like I’m failing.  But, it’s the truth.

In other news, I cannot wait to buy new clothes.  Dressing for work is a struggle.  I have 1 pair of jeans that fit, 2 that sort-of fit, and 3 pairs of “dress” pants that will stay on.  I can only wear jeans 1 day a week.  The rest of the time I just look terrible.
I’m going to keep holding out – I don’t want to have to buy all new clothes at each size. 

Here are the totals:
Weight lost since August: 57
Weight lost since November: 49
(I’m not sure why I keep track of both of those numbers other than I like to see the bigger weight loss number from August, but I didn’t really start trying until November, so I just feel like they are both significant)

10 pounds until I have a normal BMI
I think I’m gonna shoot for 29 more pounds total.  We’ll see.  It’s a flexible goal.