Decisions

One more week down.  I am officially full term - yea!  We had a doctor's appointment Thursday during which our doctor talked to us about marcrosomia (ie - having a big 'ole baby).  It was kind of scary.  She didn't really mean for it to be that way, but there are lots of scary things that can happen to me and, more importantly, the baby during birth.  I don't want to do anything that might hurt the baby. 

She gave us a whole bunch of literature that basically said 'we are most sure that we cannot accurately predict macrosomia or shoulder distocia (scary nerve-wrecking thing that happens when the baby's shoulders get stuck in your pelvis) until it happens, but when it happens it's bad.'  Very helpful.  Thank you.

So, Alicia and are faced with a decision.  Planned c-section at 39 or 40 weeks (our choice) or just try to do things naturally and see what happens.  We haven't made any official decisions yet, nor do we have to until Friday at our next appointment, but personally, I don't want to do ANYTHING that could hurt Parker, so I am leaning toward a planned c-section.  I know they are scary, but I want the doctor to do the best possible job she can and I think that would happen more with a planned surgery than with an emergency one (which we are at high risk for).  Plus, I am NOT excited about laboring and then having to have surgery.  I have heard that the planned c is much easier to recover from than the emergency.

I guess for right now, we are just sitting and waiting to see if she decides to come early on her own and debating what we are going to do if she doesn't make her appearance before Friday.  Whatever happens, I suppose that she will be her pretty soon and that will be VERY exciting!

Shower and Nursery Pics

So, now that I'm home all day, I'm a little bored. Here are the pics from our LAST shower.

These are half of the tables that Nancy had set up for us.









Close up of the tables. I think the little floating ducks are pretty cute. (We now have a TON of small floaty ducks.....)












MMMMMMM......dessert buffet.........














We FINALLY got everything moved into Parker's room, so here are a couple of views. Notice the cat by the chair still being ticked off that we moved the bed from this room. (He liked to sleep under it and hasn't figured out that it is just next door!)









The clothes on the changing table really just need washed. They aren't part of the decoration! :)

Update

Finally, after that last, lengthy, whiny post, I have some decent news! :)

My doctor has taken me off work until I have been in physical therapy for a week. I start tomorrow, so I definitely won't be going back until at least Sept. 4th. Yea! Now, I am just a little bored literally sitting around the house all day since moving hurts. But, it's so much better than excruciating pain!

The nurse did mention when I was talking to her yesterday, that the doctor is going to want to talk with us about a c-section. I'm also hoping that she talks with us about induction as well. Generally, I don't want a c-section, but I want the back pain to go away and I'm not excited about birthing a 12 pound baby (with a head in the 98th percentile), so I'm torn. I'm also extremely worried that all this back pain I have been having is indicating that I will have back labor, which I have heard is horrible! At the same time, I really want the whole birthing experience (or at least I say that now) and I know Alicia does.

So, I guess (before having even talked to the doctor) what I would like from you, my loyal readers, is some input on the c-section thing. If you have had one - what was it like? Was the recovery horrible? Did you feel slightly gypped in the whole birthing department? Just general thoughts and opinions would be great as well.

OW!!!!!!!!

If labor is worse than this, I seriously think that I am going to die.

I thought these pills would make it better.  Here are the problems.  

1) They do an okay job, but the pain still comes full force if I move around.  

2) I can't take them at school because they make me REALLY drowsy and fairly out of it.  So, basically, they are helping me sleep, but that's about it.

Here are the things that make my back hurt: 

 1) nothing, sometimes it's just a random horrible pain provoked by nothing.  This happens about once an hour, sometimes more, sometimes less.  

2) Driving.  This is the single most painful thing I can do right now.  

3) Walking, particularly up ramps or stairs, or moving with any amount of speed at all.  

4) Bending or heaven forbid, kneeling. 

5) Sitting in chairs where my legs can't be spread apart so that there is room for my stomach, also prohibiting me from leaning forward slightly (basically any chair with arms) 

6) Standing for a period longer than about 5 minutes

Here is what I have to do in my job: 

 1) Drive 30 minutes to work  

2) Walk to the building (which is farther away now that I get there later and can't get a close parking space) 

3) Walk (okay, really waddle) to the office to sign in. 

4) Begin office type work in a seriously non-ergonomic space.  My chair is about a million years old with arms and no rollers.  My "office" is really a workroom with countertops and no desks.  So, my laptop sits on the counter, I sit in the low, uncomfortable chair and try to not think about the horrifying pain in my back from the driving and the walking 

4) Teach - sit, stand, walk to board, move quickly between workroom and classroom as many children forget things like their cubby numbers, reeds etc - repeat multiple times for multiple children.  Walk around the tiered room trying to individually assess children.  Break into sectionals and try to get children to play instruments for the first time. Lots of bending over, walking and individual manipulation of the instrument in their mouths.  

5) More secretarial things - ie - making copies, cutting music and placing in folders (all while standing since I feel it's unsafe to use a paper cutter that is above your head!)

6) More teaching

7) Lunch (or rather, more typing etc while attempting to eat lunch).  My 'colleague' leaves because he needs time to "refuel and am I going to have that music copied by this afternoon?"

8) more teaching

9) Drive home, pretty much crying all the way because I have never been in so much pain - ever.  (I know, just wait until labor - but then I can have really good drugs, right?)

I really am trying to not be a wimp, but I don't feel like if this back pain is going to continue in this manner (and based on this weekend, I don't think it's getting any better), that I can keep working.  I'm not doing a good job with the kids and it's really, really, really painful.  The last time I saw the doctor, she prescribed the meds; I presumed things would get better.  She still has me working until Sept. 17th.  That is not going to work for me, but I'm not sure I can get her to change it.  I want out NOW!  I don't think I'm going to work on Monday and I'm going to call the doctor.  We'll see what happens.  I start physical therapy on Wednesday, but that's still 3 days of work away.  I just can't do it.

Enough complaining.  But those of you who believe in the 'think system' can start using it at anytime to get this moosette (she is a girl) out of me!

13 Reasons Alicia is great

I meant to do this post yesterday because I have been so appreciative of Alicia during this whole baby/pregnancy thing.  Things got a little crazy with the giant baby bit and my awful back pain, but I figure better late than never.  So, here goes.

1.  She makes my lunch.  Every day.  It's awesome.

2. She has come to every doctor's appointment - everything from follicle measuring to sperm holding to belly measuring.  She has been there.  Every single time.  

3. She lets me just writhe in pain on the couch.  Even though she is often tired and not feeling well, she will do whatever household things need done and let me lay on the couch.

4. I wake her up in the middle of the night to rub my back and she does it.  She's not sleeping much more than I am, but when she is, I am sometimes mean and wake her up because my back hurts and she rubs it.

5. She makes me dinner.  Every night (or at least every night that we cook.)  I never cook.

6. She's even been doing the dishes.  Usually, she cooks and I clean up, but lately she's just been doing it all.  

7. She brings me whatever I ask for.  I'm pretty needy to begin with and now with this whole pregnancy thing, she's pretty much at my beck and call.

8. She has assembled every piece of baby furniture.   I'm sure she has hated ever second of it, but it all looks amazing and it's done!

9. She managed to wade her way through tons of paperwork and jump through a million hoops to adopt Parker.  (This is still in progress, obviously, but the paperwork was ridiculous!)

10. She ties my shoes.  I normally wear slip on shoes for this very reason, but on the occasion when I have had to wear the kind with ties - she has tied them.

11. She has cleaned the cat box single handedly for 15 months.  It's her least favorite chore and it makes her gag, but she still does it.

12.  Speaking of gross things, she has cleaned up tons of cat puke lately.  I can't really go anywhere near it - even if I could, I'm quite sure I couldn't bend to get to it.

13. She just puts up with my moodiness.  That doesn't seem like a huge deal, but the number of times I have cried over nothing in the last few weeks cannot even be counted and every time she has been patient and wonderful even though I know I am driving her crazy.

So, there you have it.  Alicia is the greatest.  

Oh. My. Gosh.

This is going to be quick because apparently Vicatin is NOT the miracle drug and I am hunched over the office chair backward in an attempt to stop hurting. (It's not really working, FYI)

We had our ultrasound. Good news - she is healthy. We are still operating under the assumption that it is a girl. The tech said that she has never been wrong. We didn't get any new evidence today because things are REALLY cramped in there.

Here's why - Our 'little' Parker weighs 8lbs, and anywhere between 3 and 10 oz TODAY. 4 weeks before my due date. Yeah, I don't think we will be waiting that long. Oh, and her head is in the 98th percentile. I'm super excited. No wonder my friggin' back hurts.

Once, twice, three times....

I know I have complained about being done with this pregnancy before, but I think I finally lost it this week.  Sunday night, I was flipping out because she wasn't moving like I thought she should. Alicia convinced me to call the doctor (although I did call Monday morning instead of the middle of the night Sunday) and, of course, they wanted to bring me in.  So, even though I had JUST gotten to school, I turned around and drove to the doctor where they did a non-stress test.  Parker is just fine.  I'm the crazy one.

Monday night, I started having horrific back pain.  I hardly slept at all and nothing was making it any better.  I suffered through the day Tuesday, spent the evening on the couch and hunched backward over an office chair.  I would start to feel better and then I would move, either in place or to get up to go the bathroom, and the knife in my back would return.  After spending the entire night wandering from the bed to the couch to the office chair to the papasan chair to the floor and back again, without really ever sleeping or the pain going away, I decided to call the doctor (yet again).  This time I did not even  bother to go into work first.  I tried, but I was just moving too slowly because of the pain and thought it would be silly to drive to the south side if I was just going to have to go back to my north side doctor again.  Of course, I was not able to actually get through and had to leave a message, so at 8:40, I trekked off to school.  When the office called back (right as I got to school - what great timing!), we decided to move my regular appointment from Friday to today, so I left school early (again) to go to the doctor this afternoon.

Here is the good news from this afternoon's appointment.  The doctor gave me a pill for my back! YEA!  Here's to sleeping tonight!  She also set me up with some physical therapy people who will hopefully make the pill not necessary.  I don't really know what this entails since I haven't heard from them yet, but I'm hoping it just helps me feel better.  Also, the baby is fine.  Apparently, the baby is also potentially BIG.  So.......

We were asked to schedule an ultrasound, which of course will be....tomorrow.  I really don't think I was destined to go to school this week! :)  I'm kind of excited about seeing P baby again tomorrow.  I'm a little afraid that we will find out she is actually a boy and I'm definitely afraid of her being a giant baby.  I guess the good news on the giant baby front is that she might come earlier than 40 weeks (which I am all in favor for at this point!)  So, think good thoughts for us tomorrow as we double check that our baby is a girl and that she isn't some ginormous, monster baby.  I'll keep you posted.

61

Wow!  Yesterday was quite a whirlwind of a day.  The biggest event was baby shower #5.  We have been so lucky to have had so many people want to host showers and give us and the baby tons of love (and stuff.)  Yesterday's shower was completely over the top.  (All of our other showers have been wonderful as well and exactly perfect for the group of people attending.)

The entire lobby of the building was decked out with a duck theme.  Each table had a peace plant in the middle with little rubber ducks floating around it.  There was more dessert than you could ever imagine.  It looked like a wedding reception where the wedding colors were yellow and "duck."  It was really beautiful.  I haven't had a chance to look at the pictures Alicia's brother took for us, but when I do, I will post some.  It was pretty unbelievable.

Now, to the most amazing part.  There were soooooo many people there.  I would guess between 60 and 70 - which leads me to the title of this post. 61.  That's how many thank you cards I need to write from yesterday alone.  (I had better hop on this fast or they aren't going to get done before she gets here!)  I am completely in awe of ALL the people (from all of our various showers) who have come forward offering love, blessing (and gifts) to us and baby Parker.

When we entered this process, I did have some concerns about how the world would react to a baby with two mommies, but I think the past 3 months have clearly demonstrated that she is already one of the most loved babies on the planet and I am so grateful to every person who contributes to that.  So, I will happily buy more thank you cards and try to express my appreciation.  

PS - Extreme appreciation aside - it's a lot of STUFF!!!!!  Spoiled little girl! :)

Caving

So, many of you already know the name we have chosen for the baby, but we finally caved to our families via this picture. We just got sick of putting up and taking down the letters, which we think are really cute. So, here's the picture! For those of you who may not know - officially her name will be Parker Alyse LaMagdeleine Sharp.

Friday Fill-in

1. The last meal I had at a restaurant was at Steak n Shake after the UHS pitch in that had a pitiful amount of food. I'm actually pretty proud that we've made it almost a week without eating out!

2. People who can't give you a straight answer is something I intensely dislike. Perhaps this is slightly skewed right now since my newest co-worker is someone who talks in circles all day long.

3. The full moon really does make kids crazy. As a teacher, I truly believe this. They just go nuts!!!!!

4. Wicked is one of my favorite local expressions. It's not local to the midwest, but it's the only thing I picked up from our time in New Hampshire. Things aren't just wicked. They are wicked something else i.e "I was wicked sick over the weekend," or "I have a wicked mean boss."

5. Sometimes it's best to just go with the flow - don't stress about things that aren't going to change and keep a smile on your face even when you want to scream. In the grand scheme of life, it doesn't matter. (But if it really, truly matters does matter, you should NOT go with the flow and put up a stink!) :)

6. __________ is the best movie I've seen so far this year! This is still blank because I couldn't come up with an answer. I suppose that means that I haven't really seen any good movies. I suppose I could say that is was NOT Mama Mia! (which I only saw because my sister wanted to). It was entertaining in that ridiculous sort of way, but I don't ever want to see Meryl Streep clutch her hand in a fist and dramatically pull it in front of her body or wave her arms in an over the top fashion while singing ever again!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to maybe actually staying awake for the Olympic coverage (better take a nap first) and spending some time with Alicia, tomorrow my plans include cleaning the house for incoming family and baby shower #5! (Woot!) and Sunday, I want to get rid of the family (in a nice polite way) and just lounge around on the couch ALL DAY LONG!!!!!!

Back to Work

Oh yes, I am back to school.  We started with teacher meetings on Monday and Tuesday and then the little darlings came yesterday.  So far, all I am wondering in relation to working and being pregnant is.....How do people do this?  I am sooooo tired and sore all the time.  It's 6:00 and I kind of just wish I could go to bed right now.  

The thing is, I'm not really even teaching right now.  I'm sort of watching someone teach and doing lots of secretarial stuff.  I know that will change and that is what scares me.  I get exhausted WATCHING someone teach and typing on my computer?!  What the heck am I going to do when he wants me to take half the class?  

I haven't been swollen prior to this and now my toes are like sausages and I can barely make a fist.  (This is not ALL the time; it does go down, but still...)  Yeah.

On top of the pregnancy stuff, I'm in a seriously weird position.  I'm "transitioning" this guy to do my job, but he teaches much differently than I do, which is not bad, but it's strange to sit back and watch someone do your job completely differently than you would do it.  Additionally, everyone thinks (well, not the kids so much - not that they don't like him, they just aren't as enamored as the administration) he is REALLY great.  He's promising big things that I'm not sure can be accomplished in the amount of time he has.  The kids think that all of this stuff is going to happen soon and I think he means that these things will be achieved in 10 years.  Plus, I think it's crappy that I have to sit and "help" him teach and then do all the paperwork stuff when he gets to sit around and think about the program.  I dunno.  I just kind of want it to be done.

Maybe I'm just jealous and bitter because he might do a better job than me.  I don't know.  I suppose only time will tell.  It's just emotionally and physically hard right now.

Friday Fill-in and brief update

1. You know you're old when you get excited over buying a washer and dryer. (At least that was when I first felt old....8 years ago....sheesh!)

2. My heart is divided between nothing. I know right where my heart is.

3. Some strawberries and my chores to be done are what I need RIGHT NOW! I suppose that I don't NEED those things. They both will happen before the end of the day.

4. I have felt the love for a child, I have known the depths of worry for that same child. I imagine that both of these will intensify when she joins the 'real' world.

5. Gah, won't these people shut up?! (This is sort of a future 'Gah!' seeing as I start my stupid teacher meetings on Monday.....I've been through enough of them that I know exactly how they will go......)

6. Come as soon as you can! (This is directed both to Alicia and P. Alicia, because I miss her when she is at school and P because I am excited to meet her and I am soooooo done being pregnant!)

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to free pizza and hanging out with friends, tomorrow my plans include the grocery store and perhaps some garage shelving projects and Sunday, I want to sleep in and kick off Alicia's school year with a good ole University High School picnic!

Oh - and we had a doctor's appointment this morning. Things are still fine. Next time we get to start the "fun" internal poking and prodding. I can't wait. (Well, maybe not for the actual poking but at least it will mean that things are getting closer!)

Just a follower

I'm just a copy cat....... (and I'm a little bored)

USING ONLY ONE WORD.....
1. Where is your cell phone? dunno
2. Your significant other? sad
3. Your hair? frizzy
4. Your mother? GONE!
5. Your father? frustrated
6. Your favorite thing? cookies!
7. Your dreams last night? creepy
8. Your favorite drink? water
9. Your dream/goal? family
10. What room you are in? guest
11. Your hobby?sleep
12. Your fear? loneliness
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? settled
14. Where were you last night? home
15. Something that you aren't? reserved
16. Muffins? YES
7. Wish list item? house
18. Where you grew up? suburbia
19. Last thing you did? e-mail
20. What are you wearing? jammies
21. Your TV? silent
22. Your pets? sleeping
23. Friends? wonderful
24. Your life? busy
25. Your mood? somber
26. Missing someone? yes
27. Your car? garage
28. Something you're not wearing? shoes
29. Your favorite store? Target
32. Your favorite color? green
33. When is the last time you laughed? dinner
34. Last time you cried? yesterday
A) Four places that I go to over and over: school, home, Kroger, gas
B) Four people who email me regularly: Mom, IPS, Aunt, friends
C) My favorite four places to eat: Fondue, home, Jimmy's, Bravo
D) Four places I would like to go right now: East, future, vacation, shower
E) Four TV shows I watch all the time? Runway, Models, Lost, Genius

Boring update

I don't feel as there is much to post about, but even Alicia is asking me if I have updated my blog, so here's an update.

I'm done being pregnant. This seems a bit early to me. I know this happens to everyone, but I still have 6 weeks to go (assuming P decides to get here on time and somehow I think that isn't going to be the case.) I feel like I am "done" too early. But, I am soooooo done. I can't sit. It's uncomfortable. I can't lay. I get heartburn. I just want to sleep (I figure this might happen somewhere in March, but at least when she is here, I might feel like I am getting up with purpose.) I walk to the mailbox and I get so hot that I have to sit on the couch with an iced washcloth on my face just to stop feeling like I am suffocating from the heat. I am absolutely dreading returning to school next week. I am just not a good pregnant person. I'm sure this is positively shocking to anyone who knows me, my 'neediness' and my tolerance for uncomfortability. Ah well, it will be over with soon (in the grand scheme of life.)

In other news...Alicia started school yesterday. :( I miss her being home. I guess it will be good when I go back to school because at least I will have things to occupy my time instead of just sitting on the couch thinking about all the things I should be doing.

My youngest sister, Sally, arrived Friday after her softball tournament in Kentucky and will be staying with us until tomorrow. She has been initiated in the fun grown-up life of errands and not much else. We did go to the movies once. I think she thought it was rather in the ordinary whereas it was a pretty big outing for me and Alicia.

Other than that, we are just trying to solidify baby stuff. This will be much easier after our final (woo-hoo) shower on the 16th. Then we can buy the things we don't have (hopefully with giftcards) and actually be ready for the arrival of this little one. We do have to finish up adoption paperwork and get a pediatrician in order (slackers on this one....) Nothing is really new on the daycare front. We are on one (sort of 2) waiting lists and are feeling out the possibility of sharing a caregiver with friends. We will see. It will all work out - right?

Okay, that's it. Nothing's really new.

Friday Fill-ins

1. If I could travel back in time, I'd go to college again.  It really was the best time of my life, not that I don't love my life now, but I think it really blended the best of adulthood and childhood.  Ah, to be responsible for no one but myself!  (And to be skinny even though I am eating Denny's cheese fries 4 nights a week!)

2. Give me an early (not TOO early) delivery or give me a really easy job in the fall.  I'm still not sure how this whole "team teaching" thing is going to play out and I just don't want to be doing marching band of any kind at this point and I'm not sure that's going to happen.  Additionally, my doctor (as of now) will only fill out the paperwork for my FMLA to start on my actual due date, so I am stuck going to work until then (or the baby gets here....whichever comes first.)

3.  I am listening to the sounds of that really bad show "Charmed."  TNT does re-runs in the morning and Alicia really likes it.  It's like super low budget Buffy.  

4.  Somewhere, someone is thinking "I'm hungry!" Oh, wait, maybe that's just me.  We have zero food in our house and have been too lazy yet this morning to go do something about it.

5.  I'll always be P's mom.  (I didn't entirely steal this from you, Amy.)  Ever since we got pregnant it's just been kind of weird for me to think that for the rest of my life, I'm going to be someone's mom and no matter what else changes, that is going to be the same.  My identity is changing (or will rapidly change in a few weeks, since I don't feel very mommy-like yet) and it's just strange if I think too hard about it.

6.  My idea of a good time includes not thinking about stressful job stuff in anyway, relaxing with Alicia (and/or friends) and just in general removing myself from the yukky parts of my life.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to spending (yet more) time with my family, tomorrow my plans include possibly a trip to the Babies R Us, but really not much of anything if I have my way , and Sunday, I want to just hang out on the last day of our summer together. :(